Do you control your feelings? Or do they control you?

For adults, consistent motivation is a HUGE determinant in success, as is mental toughness.  The difference between success and failure can typically be narrowed down to who works harder and takes the right actions more consistently.  While humans ARE creatures of habit, we are also emotional animals.  Too often we allow fatigue (or perceived fatigue), disappointment, boredom, etc knock us off our path to success.

To put it simply, most people follow this model:

Feelings => Action => Identity

How they feel determines the type and level of action they take on a daily basis.  Those actions lead to a certain identity which isn’t always one of success and victory.

Now imagine if you turned that model around?  How would your life be DIFFERENT if you started from a place of creating the IDENTITY of what you want to be?  Imagine if you created an “avatar” if you will of who and what you want to be?

Imagine if you followed THIS model instead:

Identity => Action => Feelings

You would certainly have a lot less motivation issues.  You would get derailed by disappointment a lot less due to your mental toughness.

Now some people will say that making that switch is tough to do.  Maybe it is, but something magical happens once you start.  If you make those positive changes and start taking positive actions…..you will notice your progress and motivation will grow.  Like the circle of failure from the first model…..the second creates a circle of positive progress for you.

All you need to do is begin.  Create your ideal identity and begin to model your daily actions after what THAT person would do.

Good luck!

Yours in success,

Master Jason Nolan

http://www.impactdewitt.com

http://www.facebook.com/dewittdojo

 

Here is a motivational video by an ex-Navy Seal on mental toughness and positive action:

Supercharge Yourself For 2017

Let’s face it….Ferris Bueller was right.  The adolescent idol for so many of us said that life moves pretty fast and we dismissed it as mere hyperbole.

Life DOES move fast and most people I talk to are constantly searching for ways to get more done, feel better and perform at a peak level.  So how do you SUPERCHARGE yourself for 2017?

Well for starters, take time to unplug.  It seems counterintuitive, but taking time for you will actually make you FAR more productive.  The much heralded “hustle” is actually not sustainable in the long-term and the Law of Diminishing Returns does apply.  Plus, if you are dead by the time you are 50….was that really worth hustling towards?

So what else?  Here is a list of other ways to SUPERCHARGE yourself….sustainably.

• Sleep – Quality sleep will have a HUGE effect on your performance.  That includes work , fitness, family, etc.  Poor sleep is also a very difficult habit to break.  For most people, quality sleep means 7-9 hours uninterrupted.  Eliminate distractions (phone, dog, light coming through windows) and watch how much better you feel.
• Systems vs. Goals – Think of systems as behaviors and goals as outcomes for many people.  A system would be committing to prepping meals each week….a typical goal for people is losing an arbitrary amount of weight, say 20 lbs.  If you don’t lose 20 lbs, you fail, plus it is hard to stick to when it is a number out in the future.  A system like prepping your meals is far easier to control and succeed with.  It will also likely help you achieve that outcome goal that you used to set.
• Eat to Fuel – Approach eating as a way to fuel your body for performance.  That slice of pizza may be convenient or distract you momentarily from your stress, but will it fuel you to completely dominate your day?  Without turning this into a nutrition blog…watch a few things closer.  How is your water intake?  How many processed carbs are you eating?  How many bad choices are you making based on impulse?  What does your intake of leafy greens and low carb veggies look like?  Most people THINK they eat clean and healthy…but are shocked when they start to track their nutrition closer.
• Habits we Train are Habits we Gain – Get honest with what your good habits and bad habits are.  Utilize reminders in your phone and helpful apps to keep you on course.  There are apps for eating healthy, tracking sleep…there is even an app that grows a tree for you as your phone sits idle.  The less you check it…the bigger your tree grows.  It is called Forest.  When you do stray off course….and you will, analyze WHY and HOW you can prevent it the next time.
• Be Present – Take time each day to get in tune with yourself.  What is your stress level?  Who helps it and who hinders it?  How rushed and frantic do you feel?  What can be done to calm yourself and/or eliminate toxic people?  Taking those moments will pay off tenfold.  And most people do not do it nearly enough, including me!

Zig Ziglar once said, “Your thinking today determines your performance today.”  The beauty of the above tips is that not only will they supercharge your performance, they will supercharge your life.

Yours in progress,

Master Jason Nolan

PS – If you found value in this post, please feel free to share it!  Also, feel free to check us out online at www.impactdewitt.com and http://www.facebook.com/dewittdojo.

Want to improve your relationships? Master this one crucial skill…..

By: Sensei Jason Nolan – Impact Martial Arts – Team Dewitt

Let’s face it, we live in a hectic, fast-paced world.

Technology has given us some incredible gifts, but has also made our lives that much more complex and harried.  We truly are in an information age, given our access to a ridiculous amount of information each day.  Consider this, people are bombarded with the equivalent of 5 times as much information as they were in 1986 due to the internet, 24 hour television and mobile phones.  When you add in Facebook, Twitter, email and text messages, the average person produces the equivalent of 6 newspapers a day in information….as opposed to just 2.5 pages 24 years ago!

That is an incredible increase and one that shows no signs of slowing down.

So how does this relate to our relationships?

How has this overload of information contributed to the decline of our social lives, friendships and marriages?  Easy….we have the attention span of 5 year olds and have in many cases forgotten how to listen.  Yes…listen.

A few years ago I sat down “one on one” with a fellow martial arts instructor and was shocked by the intensity with which he listened.  It was startling….and I found myself speaking more than usual and saying more than I expected.  I actually commented to other people about it later, that I never experienced someone listening that intently.  Because it was so atypical, it was slightly unnerving to be quite honest.

Quite a bit of communication is done today via email, phone and text and it is difficult to really communicate on a deep level with any of those methods.   This is because so much of communication is body language, facial expression, and voice quality.  Plus, as M. Scott Peck said, “You cannot truly listen and do something else at the same time.”  When we talk on the phone, we drive.  We return emails and texts with other people around, the TV on, etc.

So is the answer to completely unplug?  Should we spurn the information age?

Of course not, I love my iPhone as much as anyone (even though the memory is ALWAYS filled).  Rather, we should take time to unplug for those relationships that matter.  One of my best friends is a fellow techie like me…but ironically we rarely communicate electronically.

We do lunch instead.

And we talk.

And it works well for us.

So here are some GREAT steps to effective listening…in addition to unplugging:

*Face the speaker and make eye contact – Be “present” for them.

*Keep an open mind – Don’t judge and/or mentally craft your response as they speak

*Listen to the words and try to visualize what they are saying

*Don’t interrupt and don’t impose your solutions

*Wait for them to pause to ask questions and only do so to understand better

*Try to feel what the speaker is feeling

*Give them feedback and pay attention to all communication, especially non-verbal cues

This week in our classes we are discussing Covey’s Fifth Habit, “Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood.”  It is a law about listening as described above.  Try to spend the rest of this week being a GREAT listener, and see how it bolsters your relationships AND your emotional well-being.

Thanks for reading!

If you enjoyed this post, please feel free to share it.  You can also visit:

http://www.impactdewitt.com

http://www.facebook.com/dewittdojo

Visualize Greatness; Begin with the end in mind!

By: Sensei Jason Nolan – Impact Martial Arts – Team Dewitt

Begin with the end in mind is based on a concept that many adults have abandoned or forgotten, the idea of IMAGINATION.  In this case, imagination is the ability to envision in your mind what you cannot at present see with your eyes.

As Stephen Covey’s second habit (of seven) of “Highly Effective People,” it is one of the building block habits designed to promote self-mastery.  If you can master the habit of beginning each day, task, project or goal with a clear vision of your desired direction and destination, your likelihood of success will increase tenfold.  Mastering this habit will make you a more effective leader AND will make you less susceptible to external people and circumstances shaping you and/or your life.

I was listening to Howard Stern interview Ellen DeGeneres this morning on my way to the dojo and was fascinated to hear their stories of “Begin with the end in mind.”  Say what you want about Howard’s past and overall personality, but in the twilight of his career, he has become a wonderful interviewer.  And I don’t know much about Ellen, so this was an interesting sequence for me.

Ellen described how she lost a loved one in a car accident which triggered her to write her signature comedy sketch, “Phone Call With God.”  As she wrote it in her self-described horrible basement apartment in New Orleans, she decided that she would perform it on the Johnny Carson show and be the first woman to be invited to sit on his couch.  It took over five years, but on 11/28/86, she achieved that goal (See it here: http://bit.ly/1Fw8xgM ).

Howard countered with an anecdote about the time that he had his girlfriend from age 16 on his satellite radio show.  This girlfriend was kind enough to bring love letters that Howard had written her so many years ago.  In one of the letters, Howard tells her that she should stay with him forever because he is, “going to be the most famous DJ in the world and have his own radio show.”

They had a good laugh and Howard remarked that he had NO business writing that in a letter, because at the time, he was a kid with no talent at all.  Ellen responded by saying that she was not famous, not successful and was doing comedy in coffee houses at the time that she wrote, “Phone Call With God.”  Ellen went on to say that something inside them must have held onto those visions and helped them realize them in the future.

“Begin With The End In Mind” means building something mentally, then following up with building it physically.  A great example is that a building follows a blueprint.  Are you building with a blueprint?  Or are you “winging” it?  Many people are GREAT at “winging” it, but imagine how much further they would go with a vision and plan of action?!

So let’s get back to where we were as kids, and indulge your imagination a little.  Dream, visualize and figure out what outcome you desire for your next task, job, year, or even for your life!  Good luck!

“If you don’t know where you are going, then you probably won’t end up there.” 

~Forrest Gump

 

“The next time your mind wanders, follow it around for a while.”

~Jessica Masterson

If you enjoyed this blog post, please feel free to share it and check out:

http://www.impactdewitt.com

http://www.facebook.com/dewittdojo

Conditioning Yourself For Greatness; Developing One Key Habit

By: Sensei Jason Nolan – Impact Martial Arts & Fitness – Team Dewitt

I was listening to an interview last night with Bryan Cranston, who won three Emmy awards as Walter White on the AMC show Breaking Bad.  He was chronicling his rise to fame….which was a lengthy one.  Besides a fair bit of luck (he got the part for Breaking Bad as a result of a character he played on one episode of X-Files 10 years ago), he said that he credits his success to a willingness to work hard.  Even up to the point of becoming Walter White, he was taking acting lessons and accepting whatever jobs were offered to him.

In his insightful book “Outliers”, Malcolm Gladwell talks about how the Beatles were prepped for fame due to years of playing all night concerts in Hamburg, Germany.  He credits their 10,000 hours of performances as a reason why they were poised for success.  Since then, scientists have somewhat discredited that theory (read about “Domain Dependance” if you are interested), but what can’t be discredited is the willingness of the Beatles to work hard!

One way to condition yourself for greatness, to improve your willingness to put in the work necessary, is to develop the habit of giving your best effort.

Giving your best effort means that whatever the task is, you will give it 100%…or 110%!  It means doing it so frequently that it becomes a habit…something that is essentially on auto-pilot.  We all know people that are like that, don’t we?  They are the CEO’s that we admire, the leaders of our chosen industry or sport, the people that just seem to have drive and passion in spades!

You know what they have that you don’t?  Not much if anything.  They simply understand that in our society, anyone can be successful if they really want it.  They understand that yes some people have certain advantages…but YOUR success really isn’t limited by your background, education or even your IQ.  It is limited by your mindset, your willingness to listen to naysayers (even those in your own head) and by you seizing the opportunity to sail your own ship.  As opposed to waiting for someone to sail it for you.

Lecture now complete…how can we develop the habit of giving your best effort?  How can we avoid letting our minimums become our maximums?

• Don’t allow excuses, only allow reasons why you must get it done

• Hold yourself accountable and find a mentor that will help hold you accountable

• Realize that when you give your best effort, you will develop an inner confidence that will improve both future performance AND make it easier to repeat the next time.

The final bullet point is an important point (pun kind of intended).  Your success is in direct proportion to the effort you impart.  This idea became so apparent to me during my daughter Bella’s last school year.  She struggled at the start, but was SUCH a hard worker.  She diligently completed her assignments and studied for tests.  She overcame her shyness to ask questions and directly communicate issues to her teachers.  By the end of the year, her performance had improved to Honor Roll status and her confidence was sky high.

Her success was in direct correlation to the dogged effort she gave her studies.  The best part was that I had very little to do with it.  I assisted with her test prep, but her determination was internal…not as a result of constant parental nagging.  She GETS the habit of giving her best effort and doesn’t even need to consciously consider it.  Throughout the process, she never was down on herself, because she knew that she was trying her best.

Look at what you do each day and each week….think about how you can give your BEST effort and perform even 10% better.  Remember habits we train, are habits we gain.  The habit of giving your best effort will help you to condition yourself for greatness.

Best of luck!

If you found this article to be beneficial, please feel free to visit:

http://www.impactdewitt.com

http://www.facebook.com/dewittdojo

Are your habits leading you to success?

By: Sensei Jason Nolan – Impact Martial Arts – Team Dewitt

Everyone has good habits AND bad habits.  It is NORMAL!  What separates successful people from the unsuccessful is having more of the GOOD and less of the BAD.

So how are your habits?  Is it time to do a review of what is going well and what could use some improvement?  I’ve always felt that this is a great exercise to complete either quarterly or halfway through the year.

A great framework to use is the following:

Martial Arts/Fitness/Health – How are your workout habits?  Your nutrition? Your overall health?  Are they improving, staying the same, or declining?  Remember that the greatest wealth is health, and that there is a REASON why this is number one in our framework.

Business/Career – Are you happy in your job?  Are you contributing?  Advancing?  Do you consider it a positive in your life?  People spend so much time at work that you owe it to yourself to find something fulfilling to do.  You may not love EVERY day, but overall it should not be a prison….or else, see number one above.

Financial – Would you consider your financial health to be strong, or is it any area of concern?  How would you rate your financial literacy?  This is an area that intimidates some people so they don’t seek enough education and counsel on it. Or, they avoid it because they don’t feel like they have enough of a “base” to get started.

Relationships – This could be your romantic relationships, family relationships or those with friends and co-workers. Every relationship is like a bank account, you want to make consistent deposits in the bank and not overdraw your relationship.

Personal Self-Development – For many adults, learning ends when they get out of school.  Some people pursue professional development, others take up an activity like martial arts.  Others pursue training on leadership, finances, etc.  The goal is to make continuous learning a habit.

After doing a review of your habits utilizing this framework, then it is time to make a plan of action to improve those habits that you feel are deficient or not beneficial to where you want to be.

Here are a couple of key steps to remember when implementing or eliminating a habit:

1.) Consistency – Whether you are trying to develop a positive new habit, or erase a negative old one, focusing on consistency of action is a definite key to success.

2.) Spirited Repetition – You are well aware that it takes tons of repetition to master any skill that is worthy of your effort and energy. However, there is a difference in doing your reps in a good spirited manner versus doing it in a manner of drudgery and dislike.

3.) Positive Recovery – As humans, we are not perfect and we all make mistakes and/or we all deal with challenges and setbacks. The way you deal with them, will determine how quickly and thoroughly you recover.

Remember that we are our habits, whether they are positive or negative.  Use this post as momentum to make at least one change in your habits for the better.  Good luck!

Thanks for reading this post, please feel free to visit the following sites for more information.

http://www.impactdewitt.com

http://www.facebook.com/dewittdojo

What is the Key to Success?

Have you ever been around a group of truly successful people?  Have you ever spent time with people that are at the peak of their game?  What were they like?  How did you feel when you were around them?  What type of “vibes” did they exude?

I can think of two groups in particular that are examples of success; martial arts school owners, and my classmates at Tony Robbin’s Unleash the Power Within seminar.  Both groups were comprised of highly successful people that were positive, outgoing, optimistic and focused on achieving.  They truly were the embodiment of a, “Yes I Can Attitude.”

As Zig Ziglar points out in the quote above, your attitude determines your altitude…..meaning, the key to success really is put simply, have a positive attitude.  That is pretty obvious I know, but when you dig deeper, there is quite a bit entailed in that process.

People: How positive are the circles you travel in?  Are you the highest achiever?  Do they build you up as a person, or do they bring you down like crabs in a bucket?  Do they challenge you?  Sometimes to be a peak performer, you need to change the people you surround yourself with.  Am I saying to disown your family?  Of course not, but if they hinder your positive attitude on a regular basis…..I would think carefully about limiting how much time you spend with them.  That goes for friends as well.

Personality+: Another point to consider is that you are responsible for checking your own positivity “barometer.”  People often mirror how you act towards them.  If you speak negatively, look negative, etc….that is what you will attract back!  Some people have natural charisma and a positive attitude.  Others have to work for it.  If you need to work on it, DO IT!  And don’t get upset about it!  🙂

Barriers: How well do you deal with obstacles?  Do they stop your progress completely?  Do they ruin your mood and your positive attitude?  Peak performers see them as inevitable challenges to be conquered.  They either plug along like nothing happened or they get more excited to overcome them.

Brain: Let’s face it, life is short and you DESERVE to be happy.  Your mind is a very unique organ, but it does need to be trained just like a muscle.  We do push-ups, sit-ups, run miles at a time, but how much time does the average adult spend training their mind?  Not enough!  Your mind can either be your greatest asset or your biggest liability.  Take the time to train it and you will find that you will be less influenced by negative people and external challenges.

Your mind truly is like a parachute; it works best when open.  Work daily on shifting your mindset to a, “Yes I Can Attitude” and you will find a greater level of success in life!

Thinking Big! Have the confidence and self-belief to dream BIG!

In our classes this week, we are talking about “Thinking Big!”  This is not a new idea, rather it is based on a book from 1959 called, “The Magic of Thinking Big” by David J. Schwartz.

His premise is that “your mind is what your mind is fed” and that all great success requires a change in mindset to one of thinking bigger than you have previously.  In this, there is a lot of parallel to another popular book, “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne.  “The Secret” is about the Law of Attraction, and how “like attracts like.” For example, if you think angry thoughts and feel anger constantly, then you will attract back events and circumstances that cause you to feel more anger. Conversely, if you think and feel positively, you will attract back positive events and circumstances.  They attribute this to “frequency” and the “frequency” that we send out into the universe will be reflected back to us.

I know what you are thinking….”frequency?”  Stay with me for a second though.  Take away the frequency stuff and really think about the idea.  It is actually common sense.  How we act and treat people IS usually what we get back.  The effort that we put into our lives usually pays us back with corresponding rewards.

So while I don’t think that being positive will cure cancer (though it can’t hurt), I do believe that treating people well will typically earn me similar treatment back from people.  On an analogous note, setting my goals and level of activity high will garner me a high level of results.  Even if they don’t, setting the bar high will ALWAYS get me a higher return than less activity and lower level goals will.  And sometimes, the stars will align and you will get massive results.  This is only possible though by “thinking big” from the start.

So where to start?  How do I “Think Big?” How do I constantly visualize abundance and success?  Here are a few steps:

Goals – Set aggressive goals!  Back them up with achievable shorter-term goals and action plans.  Review them often and share them with others.  Exciting goals get achieved, find a way to make them exciting!

Positive Self-Talk – Watch how you talk to yourself.  Do you do so positively?  Or are you constantly belittling and speaking down to yourself.  You need to be your own best “cheerleader” to keep performing at a high level.

Watch Your Inner Circle – Do you surround yourself with positive people? Or are the people around you constantly negative and complaining?  This includes family….we love them, but we don’t always have to be with them if they hinder our mindset.

Health Habits – How healthy are your habits of diet, exercise, rest and hydration?  Would you consider it to be a positive asset to your success?  Or is there an area or two that could use some work?

Have Positive Expectations – This one may take some daily effort but it is important to expect the best from people, situations and life.

If you are looking for a book that personifies the idea of “Thinking Big” check out the new biography of Elon Musk.  I just completed it and though he is a controversial figure, he is the epitome of “Thinking Big.”  I find what he is doing fascinating and an incredible inspiration.  Check it out here is you are interested: http://bit.ly/1NfxvFP

Thanks for reading and remember that CHAMPIONS always Think Big!

By Sensei Jason Nolan

Impact Martial Arts – Team Dewitt

For further reading, check out:

www.impactdewitt.com

www.facebook.com/dewittdojo

Turning Bad Days Into Great Days: An exercise in mind over…well mind?!

Let’s be honest, everyday can’t be a great one!  And in the age of social media, your bad day can easily get MAGNIFIED by simply scrolling through your Facebook news feed.  But that same accessibility that can make your bad day seem worse, can also connect you with your favorite people that can help you or make you feel better!

Ahhhhh…..and “therein lies the rub” as they say.  How do I use social media to make myself feel better, not worse?  So on a larger scale, how do I personally take charge of my emotions and situation and make myself feel better?  How do I make a BAD day into a GREAT day?!

Here are some tips that can hopefully help you:

1.) Breathe – Take a second, breath and gain a little perspective.  Is it truly that bad?  Our minds are powerful entities…but tend to err on the side of sensationalism.  Said another way, your mind can be your own worst enemy.

2.) Workout – Not a shock coming from a martial arts instructor, but there is truth to the old idea of endorphins.  We have an idea called the “Shoerack Theory” where when people enter the dojo to train, they leave their concerns, worry, stress and negativity in their shoes.  Then, when they are done with their workout, those same problems are either gone, or they are better able to deal with them.  Sometimes it is hard to force yourself to exercise, but I can’t EVER remember someone saying they wish they hadn’t.

3.) Seek Others – I have a friend that tends to isolate himself when he is down.  Sometimes you need to force yourself to socialize and get out of your own head.  The best way is by talking to a friend, family member, etc.  Easier said than done?  Maybe for some people…but still a key step to turning any day around.  The people close to you know you and can offer comfort, solutions and positivity…so let them!

4.) Laugh – Last but not least, never discount the power of laughter.  Be it Youtube, a TV show or even a humorous friend, enjoying a good laugh (or several) can go a long way to making you feel better.  Plus, if you are able to move from being emotionally down to laughing hysterically, then you are on the path to emotional mastery.

Emotional mastery simply means having absolute power in how you feel and react to any given situation.  Tony Robbins classifies three key areas for this; physiology, language and focus.  Click here for some information on emotional mastery.

Above all, remember that the tough days are the days that mold you.  They are the ones that make you stronger, and they are the ones that make the GREAT days, GREAT.

Please feel free to comment with any other tips or links that help YOU turn bad days into great days!

By Sensei Jason Nolan

Thanks for reading!  For more information, please check out:

http://www.impactdewitt.com

http://www.facebook.com/dewittdojo

How to improve your habits: Habits we train are habits we gain!

Experts agree that 90% of our daily behavior is habitual.  That means that most of what we do everyday is on auto pilot. Habits are formed through repetition. Good or bad, anything you do over and over again…eventually becomes habit.

One of the many great things about Martial Arts training is the awareness of this, and the constant focus on developing good habits.  The good news is that you can literally re-program yourself for greater success in any area of life!

To become healthy and fit, you develop habits that lead to better health and fitness. To improve personal safety, you simply decide to develop habits that lead to greater safety and awareness. If you want to improve your finances, you can study and develop habits that lead to great wealth and financial freedom.

Jim Rohn says, “Motivation gets you started, habit keeps you going.”  If there is an area of your life that you are unhappy about, use that to get motivated!  Let’s take health for example.  If you feel unhealthy, low energy and don’t like how you look…then use THAT as motivation.  Begin a daily regimen of doing SOMETHING active, even it is only a walk or some sit-ups.  Start watching what you are eating and educate yourself on healthier choices.  Find a friend that can join you or support you in your journey.  Utilize the power of social media to find others that have succeeded on your path!  Here is a popular example from here in Syracuse, NY.  This gentleman named Ronnie Brower has lost over 425 lbs!!  http://www.syracuse.com/kirst/index.ssf/2015/05/ronnie_brower_weight_loss_syracuse.html

So how do you get started?

1.) Start small!  Start with a habit or action step that is so small that you can’t say no to it.  Willpower is a muscle that needs to be trained.

2.) Increase that habit VERY gradually over time.  “Success is a few simple disciplines, practiced every day; while failure is simply a few errors in judgment, repeated every day.”
—Jim Rohn

3.) When you slip, get back on track quickly!  Don’t have an all or nothing mentality!  Everyone slips up and makes a mistake.  Find out why and get back on track.

4.) Be patient.  Success and results do not happen overnight.  Be in it for the long haul and make your new habit a lifestyle, not a destination.

5.) Celebrate success!  Reward yourself and be proud of yourself for your new habit!

Positive and successful habits create positive rewards. If you want to enjoy a healthy, energetic and long life, you must have healthy habits. Good nutrition, daily exercise and a positive attitude have proven to have an influence on longevity and quality of life.

By Sensei Jason Nolan – Impact Martial Arts & Fitness – Team Dewitt

Thanks for reading!  If you enjoyed this post, please feel free to visit us at:

Web: www.impactdewitt.com 

FB: www.facebook.com/dewittdojo